Pat Nolan Blog

Top 10 Porkies

Closing Time was interested to come across an old survey from UK snack manufacturer Mr Porky on the most common lies (or ‘porky pies’) told by penniless punters in the pub.

“I haven’t got any money on me” topped the list.

“This will be my last pint”, the second most-popular porkie, was followed by “I’ll five you a ring” in third place.

“I’m on my way home” came a surprisingly low fourth place followed by the famous never-believed complaint, “I bought the last round”.

In sixth place came, “I’ll give up tomorrow” followed by “Oh I’ve had this ages,” and “You look lovely”.

Finally, “I got stuck in traffic” and “I’ve got this terrible cold” rounded off the top 10 taradiddles in the tavern.

While Pork Scratchings have yet to meet their métier here in Ireland, in England they represent big business in the pubs.

Mr Porky also found that these porkies were most oft told to our partners, colleagues and employers (in that order).

And one third of respondents believed women to be much better at mendacity than mere males.

Who’d have believed it??


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